Why India Will Win The 2011 Cricket World Cup
The pundits may say anything, but the evidence is overwhelming. India are going to win the 2011 Cricket World Cup.
Here’s just a few of the reasons why.
Have you seen that Mountain Dew ad? ‘Dar ke aage jeet hai“.
After five matches so far, the Indians seem apprehensive, doubtful, scared, daresay they seem to be peeing their pants at times. If they are scared then jeet is ours.
Dhoni and co. dared to bare in this new Pepsi campaign. With their atrocious body-painted posters plastered all over India, the naked guns deserve at least the world cup in return for the stunt
Then this Kapil Dev has been a legend for far too long, thanks to a fluke from 28 years ago. Its time someone set the record straight and put the oldies in their place.
Besides, all this talk about having balanced teams with good batting, bowling and fielding is overrated. Someone needs to show the world that you can pack a team with
good batsmen Sachin Tendulkar and smash your way to the World Cup.
Very importantly, a win at the Cricket world cup will bring about a massive boost to other sports in India. Because in India when cricket gets money, other sports also grow.
Hockey is an exception. Those who say you dont take anything with you when you die are liars. Dhyan Chand took hockey with him.
All said and done, everybody has been working so hard at it. Radio jockeys, News channel anchors, barbers, all dropping their regular activities towards doing their bit towards helping India along. Just imagine if we were to lose, all that hard work comes to naught. The resulting drop in morale could actually bring down our GDP growth rate by a couple of percentages, and give our PM a couple of sleepless nights.
Now, dont we all want a well rested PM?
Think also of those who, taken in by a radio channel, bought new underwear to watch the match as that was supposed to bring luck. Likely it was a stunt by Jockey, but multiply by millions of
fans fanatics, and you have crores of sunk investment.
Cant. Let. That. Happen.
Talking of investment, Mandira Bedi has planned out her noodle straps all the way to the final, and one for the winners’ after-party. Cant disappoint the nice lady now, can we?
Heck, even Navjot Sidhu’s been rehearsing non stop in front of the mirror. He’s got lined up 44 jokes that crackle like a little boy on seeing his father open a bottle of Pepsi. 11 for each match till the final. The final that will erupt like a volcano on Jupiter every time Chacha Chaudhary got messed with.
Meanwhile, Indian petroleum companies have been forced to sell oil at a loss because of rising costs, and the fear that people will not bring back the govt to power if petrol becomes expensive. If we win the world cup, the resulting distraction might allow the govt to get away with a price normalization. People will happily buy petrol at Rs 99.94 per liter in the happy daze that the world cup win will bring.
Most importantly, there is a god, and a secular government at the center helps get him on our side.
If god doesn’t relent, Karunanidhi has agreed to step in and help out.
This year must truly be India’s best shot. With 2012 coming up soon, who knows kal ho na ho?