Open Letter to Steve Jobs

September 18, 2011
By

Hi Steve

First of all my prayers are with you. I wish that you get well soon and do make a comeback.

I know that you are no more at the helm of  the company but when it comes to Apple I can’t think of anyone who can cook better than you.

Well, like everyone else , I’m also waiting for iPhone5.  I wouldn’t have believed the rumors till I read that one of your staffer, this year too,  “lost” the prototype in a tequila bar at San Francisco.  After it is launched, I’ll  decide if I should shift to iPhone or start thinking of an excuse to wait for iPhone6.

I know it’s late in the design phase but here’s a list of features I would like to see in the iPhone5.

  1. Hope whatever service provider I use, it’ll always be in “range”, never out of it.
  2. It’ll not run out of battery when I need it the most.
  3. It’ll remind me of the contacts in my phone book, whom I haven’t called for months, and prompt me to meet people not just text them.
  4. If I am texting / tweeting / facebooking too much, it’ll switch off automatically.
  5. When I am out on dinner with my family of friends, it’ll go on silent mode and take my calls.
  6. When my boss calls me at odd hours, it’ll send a shocking radiation which hits him.
  7. For all those who have oily skin, its touch screen will keep depositing oil which can be used to run cars.
  8. If I ever drop it, it’ll bounce back to me. If I ever lose it, who so ever finds he’ll send it back to me.
  9. It’ll keep reminding me that there were times when I use to live without any phones, and those were damn good times.
  10. Last , and not the least, it won’t cost a bomb.

You’re welcome.

[Guest post by @vikaspgoel. If you would like to contribute, check out this page, or just drop me a line at contact@amreekandesi.com]

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6 Responses to “ Open Letter to Steve Jobs ”

  1. amlistening on September 19, 2011 at 7:15 am

    haha…nice ones
    I love the shocking radiation one especially :D

  2. Vikas Goel on September 20, 2011 at 7:30 pm

    @amlistening ya, that’s the number one on my wishlist too. :)

  3. ravindra rajput on September 24, 2011 at 8:40 pm

    In this season of open letters, this one is cool..
    I loved the 6th point the most :)

  4. IndianIdull on September 25, 2011 at 8:45 pm

    Superb! Next request is an open letter to Mark Zuckerberg

  5. amlistening on October 13, 2011 at 12:35 am

    Steve Jobs…RIP

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All content on this site is the personal opinion of the writer. It is in no way related to their employer or their official policies. Most of what is written here is in a satirical tone. If it hurts your sensibilities, I sincerely apologize.
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