My boy just turned one. He is an adorable kid who brings great joy to my heart. One day he will make me proud by winning a Nobel prize, or at least getting auctioned to a group of money launderers in IPL. He’s a smart boy alright. Still young though, so i wont try...
Things just keep getting better and better. I am in this year’s list of 100 most influential people in the world compiled by Time. Till just a few years ago i was a small town boy with long hair who played cricket. Today i am the person who taught India how to win. And here...
You all may have already read the anti-corruption crusader Anna Hazare’s letter to the Prime Minister. Hard hitting stuff. We managed to lay our hands on the reply the PMO prepared for him. Dear Mr Hazare, Apologies for not getting back to you earlier. But better late than never, like an Indian mother would...
Dear MS Dhoni, First up, congrats on winning the world cup. You’ve made us proud. World Champions! It must be such a Bachendri Pal-ish feeling. On top of the world! Yesterday was special. You were special. You played a most mature and responsible captain’s knock. And that last six, OH MY GOD. Out of the...
Dear Ms Pandey, We received your letter today and read it with great amusement (and dare we say, excitement). Thanks much for your generous offer of providing a wonderful therapeutic experience to the Indian team that would, theoretically help them win the world cup. One of the board members even came up with a...
Its all coming together now, like the brilliant script of Yamla Pagla Deewana. Here’s how the world will end. 1. India lose in tomorrow’s semi final against Pakistan. 2. Pakistan go on to win the world cup. 3. Javed Miandad laughs at Mandira Bedi on Times Now in contempt; calls her stupid. 4. Mandira...
In most cases, this should work fine as a report template for a match played by India. If India bat second, just change the order. Some other minor changes might be required. <Sensational Headline Indicating Great Triumph/Miserable loss> India today faced <arch-rival> <country’s name, say A> in a match percieved by many as revenge...
Mai Samay Hoon. Mahabharat style – time, the biggest (tear)jerk(-er) ever. Like the tides, i will wait for none. The only people who have been able to rewind me must be Akshay Kumar in that awesome Replayyy-something movie, and the Potter kids. Let’s walk you commoners through a day in the life of India. Not...
The pundits may say anything, but the evidence is overwhelming. India are going to win the 2011 Cricket World Cup. Here’s just a few of the reasons why. Have you seen that Mountain Dew ad? ’Dar ke aage jeet hai“. After five matches so far, the Indians seem apprehensive, doubtful, scared, daresay they seem to be...
Stage 1: Information This is when there are scattered reports of some calamity in a land far, far, away. A land far enough away for the twitterati to not be directly affected. People hunt around for news reports. Any available piece of information gets tweeted and retweeted, till panic sets in. Stage 2: Mild...
1. Thou shall never claim in public that you care about your follower count. 2. Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s followers. 3. Thou shall not post provocative DPs. Let’s keep it G rated. 4. Thou shall never add thyself to thy lists. That’s just plain cheap. 5. Thou shall not plug a blog...
A Delhi court has passed an order to allow the CBI to withdraw prosecution of Italian businessman Ottavio Quattrocchi. Quattrocchi was accused of receiving kickbacks of Rs 64 crores in connection with the purchase of Bofors howitzers back in the 80s. Since then, the CBI has spent Rs 250 crore on the case. They...
A bit unsure whether this should go in as the WTF news of the day, or the mind numbing news of the week. A mob of disgruntled laborers set ablaze a 55-year-old steel factory deputy general manager at Titilagarh in Orissa’s Balangir on Thursday. Radheshyam Ray was going out for lunch when a...
Once upon a time, in a land far far away, lived a blogger. Lets call him Arnab. Actually scratch that – cant mess around with such powerful names. Let’s just call him a simpler Ajit. Ajit was cool. He was funny, witty, satirical, had strong opinions, wrote beautifully. People loved him. All 216 of...
So 2010 ends today. As is the custom around this time of the year i must close accounts, which in blog terms translates into an annual roundup. The Twitter roundup is already done. This one is for the blog. Blogging was erratic over the year, going in fits and starts depending on work schedules. Towards...
2010 was an eventful year, which in India translates into tremendous potential for humor. You cant survive this country without a funny bone, and our politicians and media provide a continuous stream of fodder for the comedians. Here’s a compilation of some of my funny/punny tweets from this year. India released 25 Pak militants yday. All...
2010 was a lot of action for India. We endured the trauma that was to be the Commonwealth games, there were numerous scandals and scams, Barkha Dutt had to appear on TV sans makeup in a bid to save face following the Radia saga, Mukesh Ambani got his atrocious billion dollar monster of a home,...
If ever there were a well adjusted country, it has got to be India. We define adjustment. It’s all over the place. Ever been on a train? You stand in line to get a ticket, breathing a heavy sigh of relief on getting that prized confirmation. (Well, these days you wait with bated breath...
It’s that time of the year, folks. The time for Santa Claus, Christmas carols, gifts, holidays, plum cakes, parties, and just good old masti. Merry Christmas, y’all! Like always, the Twitter community has been keeping busy (working on important stuff, goes without saying). This time, we conjectured what it would be like if Santa...
The humble Onion finally gets its 15 minutes of fame, reaching the dizzying heights of Rs 80/kg. As always, Twitter is abuzz giving the veggy the credit it has finally earned. For the ones who missed the action, here’s a compilation of some of the funnier comments. Read and enjoy. @sidin: Rajnikanth has onion...
It’s been two years since that fateful day when a handful of Pakistani terrorists brought India to its knees. Today all we have to show for the 26/11 attacks is tantrum Ajmal Kasab cooling his heels in jail awaiting the death penalty. Nobody knows when he will actually get his punishment, given the long...
The Private Journal Of Navjot Sidhu
What momentous times we are living through! IPL. Indian Pataka League. IPL is like the Paro of Devdas. IPL is like the Madhushala Manna De sang about. IPL is like the Mughal Gardens in full bloom. IPL is awesome. You take all the firecrackers Sivakasi ever produced, put them near an Indian Oil tanker and...
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