Open Letters

Open Letter to Modi ji

September 28, 2014
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Open Letter to Modi ji

Tweet Modi ji, Modi ji, Modi ji, Last night, as I watched you address the United Nation General Assembly in Hindi, my chest swelled with pride. It was so refreshing to see someone showing respect to our culture and trying to instill a sense of national pride among Indians who suffer from a major colonial...
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Posted in Open Letters | 17 Comments »

Open Letter to Bilawal Bhutto

September 21, 2014
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Open Letter to Bilawal Bhutto

Tweet Dear Bilawal ji, Pehle to wish you a very happy birthday. 26! Such a special age. Reminds me too of the time when i was young and stupid, though maybe not this much. As a special gift for your happy day, you are trending on social media and every Indian is talking about you....
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 206 Comments »

An Open Letter to Priyanka Gandhi

April 29, 2014
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An Open Letter to Priyanka Gandhi

Tweet Dear Mrs Vadra, You are amazing. Just look at you. That nice cotton saree. Glowing complexion. Skin so white that you could be in a Fair and Lovely ad. You’re like Indira ji reborn as a Fab India dressed angel out to save India from evil communal forces. You’ve taken on the big...
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Posted in Open Letters | 18 Comments »

Open Letter to Advani ji

March 23, 2014
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Open Letter to Advani ji

Tweet Dear Advani ji, I don’t know if there is an easy way of saying this to someone so senior, so i’ll just say it upfront. Please let it go. It is not worth it, and you are just going to damage your legacy. Move on. Leave it. Chhodo. Chhade de. [See i even looked...
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Posted in Open Letters | 6 Comments »

Another Open Letter to Arvind Kejriwal

March 16, 2014
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Another Open Letter to Arvind Kejriwal

Tweet Dear Kejriwal ji, Not too long ago, i risked going against the Supreme Court’s verdict on article 377 by going fully gay for you, the messiah of hope, the man who was to end all corruption in the country. I asked you, RTI activist, Magsaysay award winner, catalyst of a massive anti-corruption movement...
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Posted in Open Letters | 36 Comments »

Open Letter to Arvind Kejriwal

December 28, 2013
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Open Letter to Arvind Kejriwal

Tweet Dear Kejriwal ji, You’ve done it. Chief Minister. From a one-man army to being the one who brought down a government of 15 years. Who would have thought! They called you to form a party and fight elections, and you did. And how. I spent a month listening to your radio appeals for...
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Posted in Open Letters | 8 Comments »

Open Letter to the Prime Minister

August 28, 2013
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Open Letter to the Prime Minister

Tweet Dear Sirjee, I have bad memory. Almost pathetic at times. Every year i end up getting confused whether the wife’s birthday is on 7th or 8th April. One day i’ll get beaten up, i tell you. I am now thinking of ordering discounted stock of Revital from Amazon. Salman ji has been doing...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 6 Comments »

Open Letter to Shahrukh Khan

August 25, 2013
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Open Letter to Shahrukh Khan

Tweet Dear Shahrukh, Two months ago, i  was in your town for my book launch. In Mumbai for a couple of hectic days for the big event. We didn’t have time to go to any of the touristy destinations, but the missus insisted on one place we just had to see. Mannat. Your home....
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Posted in Open Letters | 31 Comments »

Open Letter to Rahul Gandhi

April 7, 2013
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Open Letter to Rahul Gandhi

Tweet Dear Rahul ji, Boss, you’ve done it. You’ve shown India that there was a reason the world didn’t end last year as predicted by the Mayans – because we had to see your magic before the world meets its maker. I have to tell you a story first. My maid came to me yesterday...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 13 Comments »

Open Letter to Justice Katju

March 31, 2013
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Open Letter to Justice Katju

Tweet Dear Katju sir, Every generation has a rockstar. Our parents had Rajesh Khanna. Our grandparents had Bhagat Singh. Today’s kids have weird Japanese cartoon characters. But my generation, the one of gruelling IIT coaching and campus placements, might have just found its very own hero. You. Your highness. Your awesomeness. Your amazingness. Look at...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 22 Comments »

Open Letter to the Mayan People

January 10, 2013
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Open Letter to the Mayan People

Tweet Dear Mayan people, The world did not end. Thank you for nothing. Actually, thank you for giving us the biggest disappointment since Tushar Kapoor. I mean, what the hell? Do you know the damage your miscalculation has caused us humans? The world will end. The world will end. The world will end. Been hearing this...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | No Comments »

Open Letter to Arnab Goswami

December 2, 2012
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Open Letter to Arnab Goswami

Open letter to Arnab Goswami, editor-in-chief of Times Now, who has been accused in a recent news report of being a vindictive, difficult-to-work-with boss who only cares to provide entertaining news people want to watch, and wouldn't mind ignoring journalistic values in his quest for TRPs.
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Posted in Open Letters | 36 Comments »

Open Letter to Shri Robert Vadra

October 7, 2012
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Open Letter to Shri Robert Vadra

Tweet Dear Shri Robert Vadra ji, I know you’re in the news for corruption and tax evasion charges, but don’t let that bog you down. You are bigger than that, and we are with you. And of course, there’s the union cabinet to take care of that. Salman hai na? [I am guessing that in...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 82 Comments »

Open Letter to Arms Dealers

March 26, 2012
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Tweet Dear Arms Dealers and their Assorted Cronies, This is in reference to the recent news about the measly 14 crore bribe offered to the Indian army chief, General VK Singh. As a resident of a modern, developing India with a high rate on inflation, i am appalled. Nothing in India is cheap anymore. I...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 5 Comments »

Open Letter to Steve Jobs

September 18, 2011
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Open Letter to Steve Jobs

Tweet Hi Steve First of all my prayers are with you. I wish that you get well soon and do make a comeback. I know that you are no more at the helm of  the company but when it comes to Apple I can’t think of anyone who can cook better than you. Well,...
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Posted in Open Letters, Satire | 6 Comments »